Blessed...

Sorry there hasn't been much of an update, its because things haven't changed much.

Late Monday night an x-ray revealed fluid in his lungs so they took blood and sent it to the lab to check for infection but started him on antibiotics right away. They rule out infection if bacteria hasn't grown within 48 hours usually and will stop antibiotics. Today my nurse advised me they are stopping antibiotics tonight and they believe that the fluid is not an infection because he has no other clinical symptoms of it being so. They think that the fluid is related to his lungs need for extra oxygen support and put him back on the CPap, although still breathing on his own and room air. Just needs a little extra help keeping his lungs from collapsing. Its very common for babies prematurely but more so his size. I will certainly thank the lord for the Cpap and take that over the breathing tube! :) I know with time that he will not need the cpap but for now am grateful for it. Continued prayers in this area would be greatly appreciated.

In my last post I touched on the PICC line they need to insert as the umbilical line is coming up to its expiration. Today when we arrived, the nurse informed us they would be trying for the line again shortly (they had tried one time before and were unsuccessful after much searching and attempting) so we headed down to the cafeteria to eat and wait for them to be done. I prayed over the staff preforming the line and the procedure. After about 3 hours of searching and attempting again, they were unsuccessful. They explained that his skin is tough and every time they would get through the skin the vein would move and they weren't able to get it, so tomorrow they will be making an incision in his skin which will make it easier to locate the vein for insertion. Please pray with me that tomorrow's procedure is successful and quick. Third times the charm right! :) Please pray over all the staff preforming it as well, although they do this everyday, it has to be difficult to attempt 2x and be unsuccessful. I just pray tomorrow is successful and its in the lords will.

Bennett has been doing well with the diuretic and is tolerating his feeding really well. So they have upped him to 3ml's every 3 hours. :) mama is happy about this. My milk has come in, obv not as much as maybe it would be if bennett was with me all the time but I need to give my body some credit. I had my son, 6 weeks early and not the "natural way". Its going to take some time for my body to catch up.

No news on his ductus closing yet, that takes time. We ask for continued prayers in this area as this is one of the biggest concerns at the time. We are praying that when the ductus closes is causing NO NARROWING OF HIS VALVE and he is able to continue to grow and not require surgery!!!

I just have to shout from the rooftops that I just adored our staff & nurse today. All of our nurses have been wonderful but the nurse today just made me feel at home. I am still learning the In's and outs of the NICU and still learning that I am Bennett's advocate and I have a say in what goes on (although I haven't needed exercise this at all). When it comes to holding him (especially today after 3 hours of the procedure), I would do it every second but am hesitant at times because I'm adapting to my new normal of holding a 1.5 lb baby as opposed to a 7lb, not wanting to get him upset or overly tired and burn calories he cant afford, ect. My nurse today suggested Kangaroo Care without me mentioning it and got everything ready and was just so accommodating to me. It made me feel important, like I was just as apart of his care as his IVs were. :) So overall, even though it was heartbreaking to see my little man go through this procedure two times, my love tank was full from a good chunk of bonding. Resting on mommy to soothe him after his rough time.

Blessed...why? Not because everything is going our way, not because things have improved drastically overnight, not because our life has been easy these last few months. We are blessed because despite all the circumstances, God remains faithful, constant, unchanging, amazing, near, worthy. In times like these, you make a choice to find the good in it or crawl in a hole. And we choose to find the good in it, to understand the meaning of it and if we cant understand, have peace knowing that its OK if we don't. God has shown us miracles through Bennett, god has used our story and his life so far to touch many, to be a witness, How aren't we blessed?